


Anything you want could not be wrong.

by skyblue993



Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: Alpha!Jude, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempt at angst, Drama, Fake alpha Jude, I can't see him as an alpha, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Omega!Connor, Smut, Tags to be added, but I'd write it for pregnant Connor, goes against nature, story of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-10-06
Packaged: 2018-11-18 21:35:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11299296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skyblue993/pseuds/skyblue993
Summary: Jude knows there's a line that shouldn't be crossed. Yet, he does.





	1. Would you fall in the name of love?

Jude gets the text around 9.10 but only reads it around 10 pm. It's from an unknown number but it still makes Jude's face wrinkle in shock, along with the pace of his heartbeats suddenly picking up speed as soon as he recognizes who that number belongs to.

Despite he's deleted it ages ago, Jude would recognize those four ending 0000 among anyone else's.

Taylor doesn't even bother to ask, she just rolls her eyes and narrows her eyes as to search for someone in the crowded room. Then, her typical _I-know-it-all_ gaze falls back on Jude's face and lingers, for what it feels like an endless moment, over the confused frown growing wider with each passing seconds. Her look turns somehow softer in a second, like she's truly attempting to feel sympathetic towards him. Jude appreciates the effort but doesn't fully believe in the motherly look Taylor's feeding him, right now. She's never quite been Connor Stevens biggest fan base or wore the _'I'm the captain of this ship'_ shirt Whenever it came to show some support for their relationship. She's always told Jude that he was _way_ out of his league and that Connor only was using him for the benefits of his own grades since Jude's an all A's student. Connor, indeed, felt suffocated by the sudden jealousy flair striking up in Jude whenever someone talked to Connor or even praised him for being the best quarterback of the team and told Jude that maybe if was time for them to take a small break. That small break became a full two years break and Jude's resigned himself to the way things went. He swallowed down the hurt and grew up from it, used it as helpful advice for future relationships and so did Connor, apparently, since he's been dating the captain of the lacrosse team for at least three months now. “The hottest couple in the school” People refer to them with lovey-dovey gaze al over their faces. Despite being fully self-conscious of the waves of jealousy blazing across his skin whenever he thinks that he should be the one next to Connor, Jude doesn't really blame those people because, _admittedly,_ they're perfect for each other. Connor and Bryce. Alpha and Omega. Both insanely hot. Both loved by everyone. Both head over heels for each other. Jude accepted the fact that nothing was going to bring them back together. Why would Connor want him back when someone like Bryce was everything he could have asked for?

Jude has always been sure of the answer, until the moment Connor sent him a text that simply says, _"I'm upstairs. Please, hurry."_

Jude's eyes are still wide in shock when he re-reads the text. Despite his mind's been screaming at him to _not move_ , his legs miserably move on his own accord almost as he's being lured by an invisible magnet, leading him up the stairs. As soon as he reaches the bottom of it, his heart starts inexplicably rocking in his chest as a _faint_ but insanely exquisite smell causes his nostrils to flare. It makes him feel light headed, the smell of slick suddenly intoxicating his senses and causing his legs to buckle under his weight. Jude realizes he's frozen on that spot when someone gives him a light push, causing him to stumble out of the way.

“Move.” A brunette girl, clearly drunk off her ass, slurs at him, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as she stumbles towards a wooden door. Jude's eyelids fall closed as soon as the sound of someone puking their soul out down the toilet catches his ears.

He starts walking to where the scent is stronger until he comes to a stop to a door. 

The moment he opens it, Jude's whole word gets rocked to the core.

Connor's on all four on someone's bed, his fingers lazily pushing in and out of his drooling hole. Jude's breath catches in his throat at the sight of his former boyfriend in the throes of what it seems the wildest heat he's ever witnessed. Not that Jude's being a heat mate in his past life or knows what a heat looks like but from the way Connor doesn't stop pleasuring himself with his fingers, despite being fully aware of his presence in the room, he can tell that he must be pretty horny.

“C-Connor.”

Connor doesn't stop filling his hole, Jude notices, but he turns his face to throw a longing look at him from over his shoulders and Jude's heart aches at the sight of tears prickling in his eyes that, the moment their eyes lock, miserably start spilling down his face.

“What--”

“J-Jude. P-Please help me.”

“I don't think--” Connor moans out loud at the ministration of his fingers trying to reach out for the right spot to make him scream in pleasure.

"W-what about Bryce? A-aren't you two together?" Isn't he your alpha? Jude desperately wants to ask but ends up biting his tongue before the words actually slip out of him. Connor's face wrinkles in pain as he lowers down his eyes in utter shame, his fingers moving at a less erratic pace.

"He left me."

Jude's eyes go wide in surprise, his chest suddenly swelling with rage. _What?_ Connor's in heat and Bryce left him?

"He left you? He-- he was supposed to be here! For you! He's your alpha!"

Jude can't actually believe how enraged he gets by the fact that Bryce left Connor, _his Omega_ during a heat in favor of whatever beer pong competition he's probably engaged right now. Bryce left Connor when he most needed him. What a fucking coward, Jude thinks as he manages to keep his breathing steady and his voice even.

"J-Jude. P-please, I need you. I-- I know how does that sound, okay? B-but I need you to fuck me. Y-you are the only alpha I trust to do t-this right and-- _oh fuck._ ” He trails off on a wrecked moan, his bottom lip being held between his teeth so hard that it might actually start bleeding. “Please fuck me."

At those words being uttered out with wild desperation, something shifts within Jude. The room suddenly feels too small and hot as a tight, constricting tug in his chest make him breathless. Connor's here, asking him to what exactly? To fuck him until he won't even remember he already got an alpha? Okay then, Jude decides. Bryce gave up on his right to be called Connor's mate when he left him all alone in the throes of the wildest heat.

He's gonna fuck him until Connor's hole is red and sore by his cock and yet still hungry for more.

"You want me to fuck you?"

Connor nods, his body slightly bending down until his face is resting against the pillow, offering his ass to Jude as the most obvious response to that question. Jude stares absentmindedly at the slick slowly making its way out of Connor, his fingers suddenly itching to reach for it, dip his fingertips in it and feed it to Connor's swollen mouth.

"Keep fingering yourself like that. Pretend it's my cock." Jude croaks feebly, his eyes itching to flutter shut in the depth of the waves of thrilling pleasure breaking across his skin, but he doesn't give in. He keeps them open and wide, determined to capture every moment of Connor's fingers relentlessly sliding in and out of his hole, dripping with lube and slick with each motion of his fingers. Jude keeps praising him for the good show he's putting on for Jude, right now. He sends a rush of blood directly to his hard rock erection, the thought of Connor getting off on his voice, silky and soothing as he calls him a good boy; Jude's good boy.

Connor's voice breaks on a whining noise falling from his mouth, his knees buckling under his weight. Jude's hands fall on his ass cheeks, gently moving them in a circular motion over the damp skin. He leans in and presses one small kiss over the broad expanse of Connor's back raising goosebumps over its wake. "Just a little more, baby. Okay?"

"N-need you." Connor croaks out, his voice breaking on a pleading sob. Jude reaches out and gently turns his face to check if Connor's actually crying. His heart stutters as soon as he spots tears rolling down his cheeks, almost blending with the sweat prickling down his face. He lets Jude manhandle him on his back and as soon as Connor's settled down, Jude doesn't waste any time before crawling in between Connor's spread legs. Connor's wide-eyed gaze never leaves him until he's resting his forehead against Connor's, their noses slightly bumping against each other. Jude cups his face and stares into his eyes for a very long moment as he's trying to find an answer a still unverbalized question. Connor, as he's somehow managed to read his thoughts of his heart beats, just gives a small nod of his head, his eyes wide and vulnerable slowly flutter shut as he tilts his head to the side, exposing his neck where the bonding mark is still painfully visible. Jude's heart clenches at the sight, bitterly thinking that no matter what happens tonight. Tomorrow, Connor will still be Bryce's. The thought alone makes him feel nauseous but still, he doesn't want to leave Connor. He can't leave him. He wants to make a difference and maybe, maybe when Connor will be clearheaded when he'll think of this in retrospective, he'll know who he truly belongs to.

"You sure you want this?" Connor nods. Just nods. Jude needs to hear it dripping from Connor's lips that he's not imagining things, that he wants this just as fiercely.

"Connor."

Connor's eyes fall open as soon as the harsh tone in Jude's voice catches his ears. Their eyes lock and Jude's more than sure that maybe, someday, it will be their moment. Maybe when Connor's cleared enough of his head to agree to become Jude's mate because he wants it, not because all of the blood has currently rushed to his genitals.

"I need you to say it, baby."

The term of endearment puts a slight, feeble smile on Connor's face, a glimpse of light in his hooded eyes. Jude smiles back, brushing his finger over the outline of Connor's jaw, his eyes hungrily tracing the movement. "Please say it, baby."

Connor gives a weak nod of his head, murmuring feebly. "I do."

Jude leans down and captures his mouth in a weary kiss, filled with love, adoration, desperation to get this precious omega so full with his come that will lazily drip out of him as soon as he pulls out. Connor moans at the bruising kiss, his fingers lacing into Jude's hair and pulling at it as to keep Jude impossibly close until all the cm's keeping them apart are magically erased.

"You look so good like this baby." Jude tells him, his nails digging into Connor's hips until some bruises break across the skin. He lets Connor take charge and push him down against the mattress until he's climbed on top of Jude, his eyes hungrily staring at Jude's cock, hard and leaking precome all over the place. He just straddles him until his hole is at level with Jude's cock. He looks at him before actually sliding down the shaft and Jude knows he's waiting for a sign, probably of permission, so he nods his head, staring in complete awe at the bratty smile spreading across Connor's face the moment he starts taking Jude's cock, inch by inch until his cock it's filling him up in the most amazing and fulfilling way.   

"Look at your ass eating my cock out. You love it, don't you? Love how my ass clenches around it. Y-yes baby, take what's yours."

"Mine."

"All yours, baby." Jude echoes, ignoring the pang of loss in his chest as his mind promptly corrects him _'For tonight.'._ His hands trail over the smooth skin until they're cupping Connor's ass cheeks and clutching around them as to leverage himself and thrust deeper into Connor. Connor bounces on his cock, his moans echoing through the room and being the only sounds Jude wants to memorize so that on cold, lonely nights, when the thought of Connor's being someone else's mate will start flooding his mind, making his heart ache, he'll get to remember this moment, over and over again until it will actually feel like Connor's there with him in his dorm room, on his bed, moaning and clenching around his cock and calling him alpha. His alpha. Then, when they'll both come down from the heart stopping orgasm, Jude will hold him in his arms and listen to his heart beats until they'll drift off to sleep knowing that Connor will still be his, the next day and the day after that and nothing will ever change that.

It will feel real and right and perfect, just like this moment.

 

 

 


	2. Would you let me lead you even when you're blind?

Connor quietly gets dressed after the third and final round of heat sending his whole body into self-combustion. Jude's aware of every little noise he makes, every heavy short intake of breath slipping out of him and every single skip of his heart the whole time but figures that it's probably for the best if he keeps pretending to be still fast asleep. It doesn't have to be more awkward than overdue, he reasons. He's tempted to crack an eye open, though, when he feels the bed digging beneath Connor's weight, his heart picking up speed as he approaches his sleeping from. Jude's eyes are still shut when Connor leans over his shoulder and plants a gentle kiss on his cheek.

He doesn't stop Connor when he crawls out of bed and walks on very sneaky footsteps out of the door. He has no right to stop him. Connor's not his to keep although his heart decides otherwise.

***

  
It almost becomes a part of the daily routine. Jude wakes up, he stirs before lazily zombie walking to the common bathrooms. He showers and jerks off at the thought of the noises Connor has made the previous night, his voice raw and broken and playing in his ears like a broken record as he begged for his _knot._

He has to close his eyes, his toes curling in pleasure as he hears Connor's voice pleading, _“Knot me. Y-Yeah, l-like that. F-Fill me up with your pups, Jude. W-Want to be full of them.”_

He has to bit on his bottom lip in order to not scream Connor's name as come spurts all over the cold bathroom's tiles.

He dresses up, painfully aware of the bulge trapped in his pants and the faint taste of blood on his tongue as he walks to classes. He tries to shake off the memory of Connor's trembling, almost inaudible voice calling him _alpha,_ but it's literally impossible and it causes him to crawl out of his seat, in the middle of the lecture, and run to the nearest bathroom with droplets of sweat rolling down his forehead and his _cock_ ready to explode in his pants.

 

***

  
"Shit." Jude's eyes shoot open as soon as he catches the noise of footsteps coming from the distance. He settles in between Connor's spread legs and wraps his arm around Connor's waist lifting, with his other hand, the thin blanket over their heads. Connor gives a loud strangled laugh, his whole body shaking with amusement as he leans in, his lips mere inches apart from Jude, their eyes locked in a burning gaze as he murmurs, “ _Our little cocoon._ "

It sends a rush of warmth in his chest, suddenly constricting at the thought of it. Connor's right; It's their little cocoon from the outside world and, Jude realizes with a bitter heart, It's the only place where they could ever have this. He forces the heart crashing thought aside, distracted by the soft butterfly kisses Connor's pressing over the expanse of his collarbone, warm and prickling with sweat. The addictive press of lips makes him feel lightheaded but it's not sufficient to clear his mind of those thoughts, well aware that once Connor's heat will be over and blood will be flooding back to his brain, well, they'll have to discuss this, right?

Connor's heat eventually will fade off. He'll come back into senses and crawl back to his alpha, or maybe not, the remote optimist part of him suggests. Maybe Connor will stick around, maybe he'll be more than Connor's heat partner. Maybe he'll be Connor's true alpha, someday. _His only alpha._

The only one allowed to kiss him, to touch him, to hold his hand, to be his soulmate.

_Till the end of times._

Jude's on the edge of his seat, waiting for this heat to be over so that he'll finally have the chance to talk to a clear-headed Connor and tell him that maybe, this has been a sign all along. Maybe fate brought them apart so that they could find their way back to each other's arms.

"Yes." Jude whispers against his lips, his fingers gently carding through Connor's sweaty hair. His heart aches a little bit in his chest when Connor's eyelids heavily flutter shut, leaning into the gentle touch like he's just found home.

 "It's our little cocoon."

_Right now, it truly is._

 

Jude curses under his breath when the sound of a key turning in the lock of his door catches his ears. Connor's eyes shoot open in a startled wince when Jude's roommate comes in whistling something resembling the drunkest version ever made of Bohemian Rhapsody. Connor makes a noise between a snort and a strangled laugh that Jude tries to muffle by crashing their mouths together in a kiss that doesn't lose any time in becoming heated and sloppy and capable to elicite those needy sounds Jude loves to hear whenever he bottoms out before sliding back in. They become louder with every slow motion of his cock sliding into Connor with deep, measured thrusts.

"Shhh.. sshh, baby. It's okay." Jude knows his roommate's probably going to hear them so every attempt to keep this at the bare minimun of noise just fails miserably but he also can't bring himself to pull out. He just can't. Connor's moaning softly Jude's name on his lips like a chant, his nails digging in his skin as he holds onto him as Jude's his anchor that keeps him from drowning.

He can't stop. He can't.

"Shh. I got you."

Connor nods, bites hard on his bottom lip, his eyes fluttering shut in the throes of the intense pleasure coursing through his veins. He looks so beautiful like this, so wrecked but peaceful at the same time. Jude wants to stay locked in this bubble of happiness for as long as Connor allows him to and can't bring himself from croaking those words he's been holding back in the most hidden corner of his heart for a while, now that the truth behind those words has become undeniable. "You are always gonna be mine."

Connor lets out a noise of what sounds like _relief_? Jude notices as he pounds harder into him, listening to the grunts of annoyance coming from his roommate, murmuring an irritated _"for fuck sake."_ before slamming the door of their room closed. They've being left alone again but neither of them is willing to come out of their cocoon. Not yet. Jude's gaze is fixed on Connor's mouth, curved in the brightest smile he could ever wish to see blossoming over the boy's features and can't bring himself to ask.

"Why are you smiling like that?"

"Say that again."

Jude smiles, his fingers carding through Connor's hair like he knows he adores. He knows a lot of things like, Connor likes to be cuddled during sex. He likes to be touched and praised for his mindblowing body. He likes to be fucked while being cuddled at the same time.

_"You are always going to be mine."_

Connor beams at those words, his cheeks turning pink as he breathes out a soft, _"You too, Jude."_ Never breaking eye contact with the alpha hovering above him.

Jude's aware that's probably just sex talk but he can't help to fully believe in that promise with every fiber of his bones.


	3. If I warned you that the fire's gonna burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soo, I wrote this on my way to work so... it's kinda short xD hope you like it though :)

"So..."

"So.." Connor repeats the exact same word, the corners of his mouth twitching as he's trying to refrain a smile to break free. Jude's really fighting the urge to pull him close by the back of his neck and kiss him senseless before the whole school but he doesn't. Instead, He stands completely still in his spot with hands in his pocket so that the urge's _somehow_ being kept in check.

Jude clears his throat, measuring the words that he has been thinking to spill out ever since he had sex with Connor that first time at that infamous party. He's been practicing in front of his mirror for the past few days and it seemed so easy and good to finally blurt them out. Now that he's standing in front of him, losing himself completely in that gorgeous smile of his, Jude's chickening out, words stuck in his throat by a god damn lump made of nerves.

"So, huh, I guess I'll see you in two weeks?" Jude asks, his voice suddenly low. Connor throws a quick look around himself almost as if he's checking if someone's within immediate proximity. The gesture doesn't go unnoticed by Jude, completely frozen high strung by the tension that now fills the air.

It makes his heart aches, the thought of This (still) unspoken thing between being still completely hidden in the dark. Connor's face wrinkles in a frown almost as if he's noticed how uncomfortable the gesture made Jude. After a quick moment of awkward silence, Connor finally decides to break it. "I... I think I-I should tell Bryce, W-when I come back to school."

Jude's eyes widen with shocking surprise at Connor's words. His ears caught Connor's words loud and clear but it's like his mind and heart are giving him mixed signals in this exact moment. Having pictured the moment Connor was going to turn him down so many times. it almost feels like he's been imagining things. He has to make sure even if he makes a fool out of himself in front of Connor. "W-what did you say?"

Connor's frowns deepen as he repeats, slowly this time so that Jude can grasp on every word he's saying. " _I said_ I'm going to tell Bryce when I come back."

"T-tell him what?" Jude stutters, breath stuck in his throat. He knows Connor probably thinks he's suffering from a brain damage since he keeps asking Connor to repeat what he's just said but he needs to hear it. He needs Connor to be clear on what he means by _"tell Bryce."_ Tell him what? That he's hooked up with another alpha? That he's made a mistake and beg him to take him back?

"About _us._ " Connor tells him, a duh clearly going unspoken between them but that Jude catches loud and clear as the message that has just been sent in his way.

Us.

Us as a _whole_?

Us as _Mates_?

So is there an _us_?

Jude's heart skips beats as he stares into Connor's eyes completely dumbfounded, pale in the face like he's just seen a ghost, stuttering the most idiotic question Connor's probably heard in his entire life.

"I-is.. is there an us?"

Jude's heart breaks at the look of hurt flashing across Connor's features that allow him to get a glimpse of Connor's heart breaking into pieces as they speak. He witnesses Connor's mouth hanging open in a small gasp, tears forming at the corner of his eyes and his legs slowly backing up almost like he's about to run away from Jude. Connor gapes at air as he slowly walks backward, his chest lifting heavily with every sob he's trying to refrain and Jude actually wants to slap himself for causing _this._

"D-did you think--" Connor gives a long intake of breath before muttering under his breath, slow like he's trying to contain the rage flooding within him. "D-did you think I was going to _sleep with you_ and t-throw you away like nothing ever happened?"

Connor's clearly outraged by such accusation. Jude feels like shit for even thinking it now that the look on Connor's face tells him that he's clearly playing himself right now.

"N-, no, no. Of course not." Connor shoots him a glare that screams _"Really?"_ so Jude gives a small weary sigh, deciding to be honest with Connor about his doubts and fears. "Well okay _. Yes._ Sometimes I actually thought that you were going to crawl back to your alpha, okay?"

"He's not my alpha." Connor fires back with an eyebrow arched up, his face wrinkling with anger and _hurt_ written all over his features. "And if you thought I chose to spend my heat with you just because you were on speed dial-"

"I'm on your speed dial?"

"Not the point." Jude bites back a smile at the blush creeping over Connor's cheeks. "The point is, I was to trying deny that for a very long time and I guess.. I guess Bryce knew it before I did."

"What do you mean? What did he know?" 'How did he know?' Jude desperately wants to ask but most importantly 'How didn't _you_ know?”

"That night at the party-" Connor trails off on a grunt when his phone starts buzzing in his pocket, cutting him mid speech. Jude's waiting with mouth hanging open in suspance but the displeased look on Connor's face indicates that this is a conversation that will have to wait until they both return from Christmas break that, if you ask Jude, feels like an eternity away.

"Your father is here.." Jude reads the look on his face that only Adam Stevens's able to put on Connor's face. It screams expasperation and impatience.

"Yes." Connor sighs, then he takes a hesitant step forward beneath Jude's bewildered gaze. Then another one. Then one little more until they're facing each other. This time is Jude that throws a furtive glance around them. When he's sure it's safe, he reaches for Connor's cheek, gently stroking it with his thumb. Connor lets out a soft noise from his throat, leaning into the soft touch of the alpha.

"We'll talk, right? We'll figure it out?"

"Yes." Connor gives a nod of his head, reaching for Jude's hand, his fingers playing with his pimkie causes a grin to spread across Jude's face. "We'll figure this out."

Connor's smile somehow calms the raging storm of emotions flooding Jude's chest.

He knows it's going too far if they kiss but Jude can't really fight the urge to pull him into his arms one last time, burying his face into the omega's neck and scenting the distinctively sweet smell of _cherries_ oozing from every pore.

Jude loves cherries. He loves Connor's scent. He also loves Connor, probably more than the other two combined. 

Connor waves at him as he climbs into Adam's car and Jude can't help but grin wide in anticipation of their talk.

They'll figure it out, Jude's sure of this.

 

_Except when they don't._

  
"What?!" Two weeks later Jude's standing at Connor's dorm room, gaping at the new piece of information Connor's roommate Albert was kind enough to give him. “I swear to God if you are messing with me _right now.”_

"I'm sorry b-but it's true." Albert stutters out with heart rising his throat at the murderous glare Jude's sending in his way as words make their way out of his mouth.

_"He was supposed to be here."_

"He's not." He retorts for the tenth time, with a heavy sigh escaping his lips. "He never came back."

 


	4. In the name of love.

Connor's curled up on the couch, his eyelids heavily falling shut with the sound of the wind tickling against the window, lulling him to sleep. He's been napping a lot in the past few days. Tears, _fear_ and emotional exhaustation wore him out of energies. He doesn't bother to open his eyes when the door bell rings since Adam's soft voice calls from the kitchen, _"I'll go."_ followed by the soft thud of the door opening. Connor's eyes slowly flutter open. He blinks, finding weird the heavy silence that follows. He sits up, stretching just a little. Then, he hears the unmistakable voice reaching his ears. _""And I'm not leaving until I do. I wanna see him."_ loud and sharp and _demanding_. It makes Connor's heart race in his chest, his legs wobbling as he makes his way to the front door and winces at the scene unfolding before his eyes. Jude standing there with bloodshot eyes and hair messy and distressed by what Connor assumes is his own fingers, _growling_ at his dad who gapes aimlessly at the young alpha, unsure of what he's supposed to do in this moment if just simply let him in or beat the crap out of the scrawny boy that's daring to flash his fangs at someone that is also an adult.

The immediate second Connor steps behind his father, a tiny, trembling hand coming to rest on his shoulder, Jude's sharp expression softens, just for a moment, the moment he lays his eyes on the omega. Their eyes meet and Connor's heart aches at the way Jude's mouth falls open on a relieved sigh, his nostrils flaring not very subtly before his huge, red eyes finally flicker on the still barely visible bump hidden beneath his high school sweatshirt.

"Connor." Jude gasps, his clenched fists falling to his sides. Connor ducks his head suddenly feeling flushed all over with embarrassment and regret. He only hears Jude's voice, rough and thick with hurt like he's just been stabbed sharp in the _heart._ "Were you ever going to tell me?"

 

\--

 

"Jude. Jude?" Connor lets out a loud, distressed noise of frustration, staring idly at the boy crossing the room. Heavy breaths filling the room. "Jude!"

"What?" Jude finally jerks around, his eyebrows coming together in a sharp line. “What is it?”

Connor gulps down, forcing words out. "P-please.. s-say something."

Jude lets out a humorless laugh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Oh now _I_ am the one that's supposed to talk? How about _you_ tell me why haven't you come back to school?” Connor stares, completely speechless. “How about you tell me when were you going to tell me about it? If, you were about to _ever_ tell me about-"

"I was scared!" Connor cuts him off, his shoulders shaking.

Jude stares at him, wide eyed with incredolousity flooding them. "Of what, exactly? Of _me_?"

The silence coming from the other end is clear enough as an answer.

"Really, Connor? What. You know, I can't believe it! After everything we've been through!"

"That's the whole point of _why_ I kept it a secret.” Connor intervienes, his voice thick with regret. “W-we already had a lot of our plates and w-when I found out, I just.. I couldn't bear my own happiness. I was supposed to get anxious or _terrified_ about this because I'm still in fucking college and an unexpected pregnancy requires money and responsibilities and a lot of rest but, but I couldn't care about any of that, you know? B-but then I thought of us and how messy things are in our relationship and-"  
Connor sucks in a breath, his eyes flickering to his lap as he mutters out, voice full of shame and hurt, "I thought about you and how you were going to react and I suddenly felt my throat constricting, you know? I.. I was on my way back to college and I started panicking. I couldn't.. I couldn't bear the look on your face or to hear you say that a baby isn't in your plans."

Jude stops him right away, his voice borderline furious.

"Of course a baby _isn't_ in my plans at this age! I'd be lying to you if I said that I'm not completely terrified by what the future holds for us! We're still young and jobless and yes, _we are_ a mess but I'd never let you go through all of this alone. I love you-" Jude notices Connor's eyes go huge, staring at him with mouth wide open as the most shocking news has been just thrown into his face. In a way it kind of did. "Yes, you heard that right. I loved you back then and I love you now and it won't be easy-"

"It won't." Connor agrees, his eyes flickering down to the floor, where Jude's suddenly kneeling before him, looking up to him with so much trust in his eyes that breaks Connor from the inside, a flood of tears prickiling at the corner of his eyes. 

Jude gives a shaky breath as he takes Connor's hand into his own, the other one gently brushing his tears away. The gentle touch capable to calm, a bit, the raging storm of emotions flooding through him in this current moment,

"But I want to make this work." Jude tells him, his eyes pleading and voice soft as he asks, "Do you?"

"I do." Connor nods, a small, hesitant smile playing over his lips. "B-but h-how are we going to make this work?"

"Connor." Jude lets a bright smile to take over his features, "Do you trust me?"

"I do. I'm sorry if I chickened out, I was just too scared of what you were going to say and if you were going to leave me." Connor trails off on a sigh, his gaze dropping to his stomach, where his fingers are fiddling with the fabric, slightly stretched over his little bump. _"Us."_   is Connor's prompt reply that makes Jude grin even wider and slowly standing up until he's at level with Connor's face, their noses brushing against one another. Connor lets out a soft, cooing noise when Jude cups his cheeks, their lips so close that they're almost touching. "I'm here." Jude tells him. It almost sounds like a promise to Connor's ears. "I'm not going anywhere but by your side." He breathes out, his fingers trailing down his cheek and jaw until they join Connor's curled  over the fabric of his shirt. Jude lets out a small noise from his throat when he feels the bump beneath his fingers. It feels kinda strange, used to feeling nothing but hard muscles all over Connor's skin.

 _"Hi."_ He says, and Connor knows he's not addressing to him. The thought of Jude actually greeting his _bump_ makes his body shake with affection, his shattered heart finally getting whole again.

**Author's Note:**

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> 
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